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How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Remember going back to school after your summer vacation and the teacher asks you to write an essay about what you did over the summer? Well, this is that essay although I’m retired and every summer is a vacation for me. 

 
It actually started in February when I got a notification from my friend Hayne Dominic. He and Gary Gore hold a yearly event at Mason-Dixon Dragway called the “Rocking Chair Nationals”. It’s a nostalgia drag racing event featuring the cars and stars of years gone by. Each year they recognize different categories in drag racing and this year’s honorees were to be photographers, journalists, and announcers. I would be one of the honored and would I be able to attend? Would I? You don’t have to ask me twice! June 24 is the date of the event.

Ordinarily, I wouldn’t write something tooting my own horn, but the company I would be in required I do so. This event and two others was all I had planned for this year. So, my wife and I drove for 5 hours from Long Island, New York to Hagerstown, Maryland, Friday morning in the pouring rain. Fortunately it stopped when we pulled into the hotel parking lot. That’s when we heard a rubbing sound coming from the right front tire of my Acura RDX. Great! Seriously? Now? We unpacked and went straight to the track (3 miles away) where a track official determined that there’s something stuck in the brake. Its 4 P M and the nearest Acura dealer is an hour away. We’d never make it before it closed but a Honda dealer is just 3 minutes away so guess where we went? In case you’re wondering, an Acura and a Honda is pretty much the same car. So off we went, found a technician, explained the situation, and had the car on a lift in no time. About a half an hour later, the tech came back, placed a pebble in my hand and said “That was your problem”. I still have that pebble because it’s worth $103.50!


 We went back to the track and met up with Hayne and Gary and Fred Bear and others and we were promptly invited to have dinner with a host of others at a local Mexican restaurant. There were about 20 of us. We sat and had a good dinner with friends new and old. About halfway through, a tall gentleman sitting at the end of the table got up and announced to us that he just paid everybody’s tab! Came to find out it’s the track owner, Elmer Wachter. Hey, I know that name! That’s Dr. Wacko. He drove a wild silver metalflake blown Jeep called Quicksilver with the Wild Bunch group in the mid-80s. I jumped up from my seat and rushed outside to meet and thank him for his generosity. How cool is that? After dinner, it was back to the hotel for a long and rollicking bench racing session before heading to sleep.


Up early Saturday morning at to be at the track by 9:30 A M. That’s when the ceremony would start. Among the honorees were Jack Redd, Steve Bell, Todd Dziadosz , Vern Abernathy, Sam Auxier, Jr, Steve Lesuer, Tom Mc Rea,, and Phil Hutchens to name a few. Plaques were given to each of us and we were interviewed by Bill “Drag List” Pratt, Hayne and Gary. When it was over I found the time to try out my new camera. It has a vehicle tracking feature and I was eager to see how it performed. It did very well, but truthfully, it was just too hot to stand out there and shoot anything for an extended period so it was back to the tent for more bench racing before we left for the day. And a great day it was!


This brings us to July and nothing is on the docket. Actually nothing until the Dover Drags at Lebanon Valley N Y at the end of September. In the middle of July while talking with a good friend about having a lunch date, he was lamenting not being able to go to any events this year. He (and I) missed the nostalgia event at Cecil County Md earlier in June and he didn’t have any other on his docket. I should mention that among other attributes, he is a fireworks enthusiast and attends a fireworks convention each year (Wisconsin this year). This year’s event would be in early August. I mentioned Island Dragway’s 63rd Funny Car Throwdown in Great Meadows, N J (home of Don Garlits’ first official NHRA 200 mph run) was on August 6 but he couldn’t go because of the convention. He thought about it a bit and said he wouldn’t be leaving until the 11th, so………

We left Long Island at 7:30 A M August 6 bound for Great Meadows N J! We arrived there in 2 ½ hours, a minor miracle if you’re familiar with the Cross Bronx Expressway and the George Washington Bridge. In fact it was the same time going home. Amazing! There wasn’t even a line getting in. The lineup for funny cars included the Chris and Krista show featuring almost identical Monzas, The Sweetman Brothers Frantic Ford Mustang II, Rocky Pirrone’s Screaming Eagle T/A piloted by son Joe Jr (his first driving gig in competition), Dave Sano’s Screaming Insanity Cuda, Bob and Jon Wall’s Fireball Monza, Bill Dee’s Nor’Easter, Jim Gifford’s’ Svengali T/A, Rob Bundy’s Shellshock Vega, John Cerchio’s War Path Buick Somerset, Robin and Matt Stambaugh’s Generation X Vega, Ray and Cody Helger’s Dazed and Confused 69 Camaro, and Willie Johnson’s No Money No Funny Nova. Also on hand were 6 front engine dragsters from the East Coast Fuelers, Mike Geroni’s Fiat AA/A and Bob Hall’s Busting Loose Fiat AA/A as well as a wide variety of entries from N E T O.


 Funnies would make 2 passes each (as well as the fuelers and altereds) with the 2 low elapsed times from the first round squaring off for the title. Kudos to Chris Massarella for putting together a flawless show. The East Coast Fuelers put on their patented smoky burnout and strong racing show. Mike Geroni had a good event as well taking both of his runs in his Fiat altered. Cody Helger took the Funny Car title with a strong 6.75/200mph pass in the heat of the day. And I’m not kidding about the “heat” part. It was HOT! High 80s temps all day took its toll on all of us. I really felt bad for the drivers in their firesuits waiting in the staging lanes to make a pass. I tried real hard to stay hydrated and although I had about 7 bottles of water and Gatorade and losing 5 lbs., I almost passed out at the top end taking parachute shots. A mistake I will not be making again! As an aside, last year’s event was held in October due to a few rainouts in August. That day was sunny and the air was cool and crisp with no humidity. A very enjoyable day. Maybe Melissa and Carl Milano will consider moving it next year?


   While we were going around the pits, my friend stopped by the exhibit by the DMC (Dead Man’s Curve) car show. It didn’t take long for him to inform me “We’re going!” So………

    • Yet another unplanned event and in New Jersey to boot! Dead Man’s Curve is a car show held each year on Labor Day Weekend at the Sheraton Hotel in Mahwah, N J. It’s not just a car show, it’s more like a car happening. Hot Rods, Rat Rods, Customs, Muscle Cars, Show Cars, Antiques (a few), trucks (a few), vendors, bands, food trucks and celebrities like Candy Clark and Charles Martin Smith from the movie American Graffiti and Butch Patrick better known as Eddie Munster. Oh yeah, and then there’s POR Presents Thunder Alley powered by Racing Junk. Thunder Alley is the brainchild of “Big” Al Liebman. Al has a long and storied past in drag racing and especially with funny cars. Ever since he first saw them at Englishtown (N J) in 1969 he wanted to be as involved with them as much as he could. Short of driving them he’s done everything else and is currently involved with the Super Camaro funny car as well as being Senior Sales Exec at Racing Junk. The idea of Thunder Alley in the beginning was to cackle a few cars for the audience (2 to be exact). It has since blossomed to over 25 supercharged funny cars, front engine dragsters, a fuel altered, and a wheelstander! All cackling on healthy doses of alcohol and nitro. The cars are lined up on the road adjacent to the hotel entrance and 3 times a day all 3 days, they are cranked up and cackled. And it’s LOUD! I was standing between War Path and the Frantic Ford and it was total sensory overload. Highly recommended! The crowd applauds and roars in approval. This year’s participants included;


    The Sweetman Brothers Frantic Ford Mustang II
    Rocky Pirrone’s Frantic Ford 1970 Mach 1 Mustang
    Troy Leibe’s Thriller Fiat Altered
    Rocky Pirrone’s Super Camaro
    Rocky Pirrone’s recently completed Time Machine Willys
    Hell Bound
    Poison Arrow
    Iron Outlaw Mustang II
    Matt & Robin Stambaugh’s Generation X Vega
    Paddy Wagon wheelstander
    John Cerchio’s War Path Buick Somerset
    Nightmare Arrow
    No Money No Funny Nova
    Bits & Pieces T/A
    Big Girl 55 Chevy
    Shellshock Vega
    KS Speed shop AA/FD
    Lynwood Spl AA/FD
    Gloyd & Grimes AA/FD
    Blue Mountain Express AA/Fd
    Freaky Tiki Fiat
    Mike Geroni Fiat
    Bradley Grey/ Blown Mafia 1970 Nova
    Bud Man Arrow
    Temporary Insanity Monza


    That’s at least 25 cars cackling at once. A flawlessly run segment during a truly wild yet enjoyable event. I witnessed the 1 P M cackle but wish I could’ve seen the 8 P M cackles with all the visible flames. Oh well, there’s always next year.
     

    And that my friends is how I spent my summer vacation. How did you spend yours?

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    Bill “Grumpy” Jenkins

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    World of Mopar

    By Bill Kloss • 30 Oct, 2023
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    STAY BEHIND THE WHEEL

    By Jim Feurer (Animal Jim) • 12 Oct, 2023
    Many race drivers retire too soon. Some not soon enough. A lot depends on level of racing, expense and sponsors. And of course desire. No matter. Stay behind the wheel long as possible. This advice can also be used as a metaphor. My shrink friend Chris Holley back a few years told me, “Jim, whether it is a seven mile an hour garden tractor or a 200 mph race car, you are happiest behind the wheel.” It dawned on me later as I recalled his words. The man was correct. How do you know when to give up your seat? That question could be different for all. A football player example would be comparing Broadway Joe Namath with Tom Brady. The smart way to hang up the driver fire suit or football equipment etc. is when you are on top of the game. And importantly, affordability comes into play both ways. Can you afford to still drive or play ball or cannot afford not to? Which brings my ramblings to my own situation. I never had major dollars behind me. But even after I retired from Pro mod competition and sold my contemporary ride, From 2000 to 2012 ,I still could book my old Pro Stock from the 80s for vintage match races , that ironically paid pretty well. So I booked a couple to 4 a year to supplement our income. So it goes. I hung it up for good in 2012. There were too many problems. Like forgetting to plug in the cooling fan for two outings. Not realizing new batteries were needed. My foot slipping off throttle pedal Etc. My car Zeke and I were tired. WE both needed to be refreshed. Or retire. I always say, “Everything ends”. It may not end the way you wanted. But it ends. My ending sucked. I went one booking too long. It still haunts me. Some racers I admire for quitting fairly young and on top are Jackie Stewart, Ron Colson, Bob Olson. Those that stayed with it are Arnie Beswick, John Force, Wayne Torkelson, Bill Neri, Animal Jim. Etc. When Folks call my time drag racing as a professional a “HOBBY” that riles me up. It may have been a hobby for some. For me and Linda it was far from a hobby. Linda was my team manager and she kept tract of the money and we made a living drag racing. The Animal Jim Racing program was a serious business. We made some money with Animal Jim memorabilia. Selling Animal Jim T shirts, hats ,hat pins, sweat shirts etc. Linda even hand made wild graphic sweat shirts with her own label. “ANIMAL WEAR”. We also had the Lacon ( little home town) hands on First National Bank boasting live tellers and staff in our corner. That started about 1989. We needed to update. But we needed cash. Linda went to the Lacon bank with a stack of future match race contracts and several magazines featuring Animal Jim. The bank stepped right up and loaned us whatever we needed from then on. As long as we paid interest the bank would renew our loans annually. And we always paid back the loans. After every successful outing, Linda would keep the cash we needed and take the rest to pay on the bank loans . Linda and I were a team. Several times we jumped off the cliff of opportunity hoping to grow financial wings on the way down. Somehow we always did. I often wonder what it would have been like to have a major full ride. Our race crew was mostly volunteers, which we much appreciated. But there were a few times it was just Linda and I, and sometimes only me. I recall an Oct. race in Canada in 1981. Linda was teaching school of course I went alone. I recruited a couple fans to help. Now at 82 I make a few close to home cruises with my 64 R code Galaxie ;with my son in law Doug Fennell’s help. For farther ones I use my 2005 GTO. It has now become a classic due partly to it’s rarity. My Linda Lou loved all racing . But not car shows and cruises. A current post on Face Book shows my now late Linda Lou in the passenger seat of our 64 Galaxie as we are leaving the cruise at the Oglesby ,Il root beer stand. A rare picture indeed. That picture was 5 years ago. Any way getting back to the topic of my rambling, heed Dr. Holley’s observation. Stay behind the wheel long as possible. Even if it is a 7 mph mower. Oct 2023 Animal Stories. By Animal Jim Feure Epilog: For those not informed, my precious Linda Lou went to school teacher heaven Aug. 24, 2023. Linda was 81 and taught school right to the end. In fact right after she died the funeral director was our home. The phone rang. It was a local school wanting to hire Linda as a sub. She commanded a Job even after she died! In the haunting lyrics of Frank Sinatra, My angel eyes are gone. .

    To Win-and Win Not

    By “Animal”Jim Feurer • 26 Sep, 2023
    I am sure many of you know Earnest Hemingway's novel, TO HAVE and HAVE NOT. It was made into a B &W movie in 1944. Staring Humphrey Bogart and introducing and staring the sexy Lauren Bacall. (The word sexy in dictionary should have Bacall’s picture as example of sexy.) This story is about races I should have won and did not. What I am about to tell happened long ago so some of the half dozen situations may not have occurred today. I had two rooked situations which definitely reduced me to runner up in finals. The worst was a race at an AHRA national event Winter Nationals in Tucson, Az. I was racing the early 80s Nitrous Small Block Zephyr Pro Stock Zephyr nicknamed ZEKE! Nitrous for small block only had been put in rules as an option two years ago to try and even the sudden unlimited cubic inch rules .There was a lesser weight rule for unlimited cubic inch small blocks. Problem was the small block cars could not get light enough to use that weight break advantage. 600 plus CI plus Big Block cars could get to their min 2350# weight. Enter The Nitrous Oxide Option. No SB CI Limit. But had to ad 250 LBS. to the Unlimited SB base weight. If canted valves,(like my Cleveland Ford-ad another 50# Types of trans also had wt. factors. My Merc Zephyr with Cleveland, NOS Nitrous and Lenco 4 speed weighed in at almost 2600 pounds. Zeke was AHRA legal. I was sponsored by NOS . In 1982 I had won a few races including an AHRA National Event and several runner ups. Also set several records. I might have won the AHRA pro stock season Championship if parts would have arrived on time. We were using los of parts, learning about nitrous. I missed AHRA Salt Lake and Spokane, the AHRA World finals. By missing those last two events, I was reduced to 3rd. in the 1982 AHRA pro stock season championship. Back to the before mentioned 83 Winter Nationals. It was the start of a new season. I was trying to win the AHRA pro stock championship this year. After months of preparation, and traveling 2000 miles through snow, ice, sleet, rain and high winds we finally made it to Tucson after 56 white knuckle trailer towing hours. Changing off driving with the late crew chief Cliff Sturm, and crew Terry Shirley and Dennis Paccetti. I had run this race several times. The last season I was number 2 qualifier and I got runner up. This year I came loaded for bear. Good crew, Spare engine, spare Lenco and spare third member rear ends. I also had a spare set of new slicks. These were actually listed for a rail dragster. Slightly smaller than the popular Pro Stock Goodyears. These were much lighter with a Super soft compound. They would be needed before this week end was over. When we arrived at Tucson mid morning Friday an overnight snow was melting. By 1.00 pm I was ready to make a qualifying run. The first run was only average. Starting line was junk. It had been repaved and was pealing up. By Saturday the track personal had moved the starting line ahead. I assumed the top end clocks were repositioned accordingly. Next run was better but we nipped a piston. We had to put my fresh 409 ci Cleveland in. Made another qualifying attempt. It was pretty good. We were number two after that. I wanted the number one spot. It meant another $500 bonus from my sponsor NOS. It was late SAT. Night I made my last qualifier. About midnight, air temp 30 deg. F. I had put those new soft dragster tires on Zeke. I left starting line at 6500 RPM. Wow what a run. Those tires did the trick. I could feel them grab at all 3 shifts. We were number 1 qualifier by a bunch. Later that night while celebrating being number one , one of my crew dove in the motel pool. Wow. Dennis dove in clothes and all. I was 12.30 am and only 30 degrees. The desert gets cold at night. At the track next day first round was at 1PM. Conditions ideal. Sunshine and 65 degrees. In 1983 Pro Sock in AHRA was a 8 car field. Ladder was old school. 1 ran 5 -2 ran 6 and so forth. So I had non other than Roy Hill for first round. Roy had a Mountain Motor Mercury Capri. Roy struggled to get to number 5. That big engine was too much for the Tucson track. We had swapped my engines Friday night from my killer 427 Cleveland to my 409” Cleveland and milder nitrous to get down that slick track. My first round of eliminations turned out to be the most bizarre and longest stating line burn down in history. Roy and I did our burnouts. We moved up to stage. Mike Thermos ,owner of NOS was my stage guide. As I start to light my first bulb ,Mike stops me. Roy Hill has backed up. I backed up to see his crew has rear deck lid off and adjusting his rear shocks. Starter motions for me to stage. All I had to do I light one bulb and Roy would be disqualified. But I wait. His crew finished and we start to stage again. Before I can light my first bulb, Mike stops me again. Roy has backed up again. So I back up again to see. Roy’s crew is now adjusting his wheelie bars. When done Roy backs back into the water! Well, hell. So do I. Roy and I start all over again. Both doing fresh burn outs. The starter is going ape! This time we both pull up and in as we should. I beat Roy Hill and his mountain motor Capri. In the semis I beat Jim Basko in a routine elimination. Seemed no one could get down that track but me. For the finals I had a local entry, Bennie Flowers. He did not seem a threat. But I must have been over confident, plus being distracted with all the hub bub by announcing I was to receive the first ever AHRA ALLSTAR award. I was confident I could out run anyone that day. OOOPS! I forgot one of my cardinal rules. Never to under estimate your opponent. Benny and I left the line fairy close. But Benny was staying with me. It was so close at end; I could not tell who won. Amazingly Bennies win light came on. The announcers and fans went nuts. I must have been lazy at the tree. To add insult to injury, I had just ran the record Pro Stock et. For the event. Some of my fans that were at the finish line bemoaned I had actually won by half a fender? Mid week I even got a call from a sponsor congratulating me for winning. When I told him I lost, He said, “Bull shit! I was standing right there but left as you crossed the finish line to catch my plane to LA.” After the finish , I almost had enough fans etc. convince me to contest. But while returning to tower for my All Star award pictures I noticed Don Garlits and Shirley Muldowny mid track arguing with staff as to who, if either had centerlined. Also it would be poor sportsman ship on my part to contest my finish. Plus when I got to tower, Benny Flowers was in tears over winning. Repeating, “I NEVER WON ANY THING BEFORE” I was not about to rain on his parade.  So I was runner up at Tucson once again. Win Not! ANIMAL JIM SEPT 2023. .
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